October 9, 1997

• Handling emotionally charged meetings

• Perseverance in dealing with uncertainty

• Be vulnerable and reliant on God

• Love does not dominate

God illuminates your lives through loving care and compassion and patience. Yes, even the lives of human beings require the patience of God. Patience is indeed a virtue. It is a godly virtue because it is a quality of God. God exercises patience and compassion and nonjudgmental love directed toward all human beings. It is true, you do try the patience of God.

It is not God’s wish that strife and turmoil exist between nations or people. It makes no difference where that strife originates. It must be diffused. One of you commented about bringing boxing gloves with him to a meeting, in jest of course, but there was a truth to that comment. The truth is that he brings with him a defensiveness, for gloves are only necessary for defense. If gloves are to be brought to a meeting that carries with it emotional baggage, the gloves which are necessary are the gloves that one uses to handle the most delicate crystal, for when you engage in disagreements with someone, you are in disagreement with a creature of God, with a creation of God. One is, in effect, in disagreement with one’s self in the process, for as we have said, there is no significant difference between individuals as they relate to God.

It is one thing to suggest compassion and patience in dealing with another. It is something quite different to exercise that compassion, that patience. If you seek to elicit another’s confidence and understanding, you do that by sharing, not judging.

You are all going through some personal transitions. That is fine, it is appropriate and necessary, but these transitions serve as seeds for growth—growth of the spirit, the mind, the body, growth in relationships, growth in confidence. There is nothing that any of you face that is in itself destructive to you, but transitions are challenges because of the element of uncertainty. Part of your charge in experiencing human life is dealing with uncertainty. The more you deal with it, the more confident you become of your ability to endure.

Perseverance is a gift. Some, when faced with a challenge, back away. Others move confidently forward, not knowing the result, but having faith in the process. It is the process here which is most important, more important than the end result that any of you may seek. It is the process that provides the growth, not the result.

Most of what you pray for in terms of sought after results are in themselves basically of limited value, limited duration, limited consequence. The growth that is achieved is the result of the prayer. It is in connecting with God that growth takes place, regardless of the outcome. You are strengthened by the effort, not the result. When you encounter challenges that have significant importance for you, even temporary let alone long-term, the spiritual gain is the effort that you apply to see the challenge clearly, to see your place within that challenge. Your development as human beings is enhanced or strengthened because of what you go through to reach the conclusion you seek.

Ultimately there is only one important goal in life—that is to become closer to God. This proximity, this closeness does not imply perfection, but rather reliance. Some may see reliance as a sign of weakness, but it is an acknowledgment and an association with strength. If you rely upon another, you are attaching your sense of well- being on the efforts of another. You are not relying solely upon your own skills or abilities. This kind of dependence on God is rare, for it means that when difficulty strikes, you are ready to affirm your connection with God rather than your own dominance. This association with God becomes a stronger bond than any other possible association.

Love in its truest form is one of vulnerability and reliance, dependence—not domination or control. Domination is not love; control is not love. If you love another fully, you are sharing your willingness to be vulnerable, to be dependent, to be in need of support. This is true whether you are thinking of another human being or of God. Your growth as a spiritual being is directly related to your willingness to let go and allow God to direct your lives, to direct what happens around you and then respond to that direction. True love is not passive, but it is interreliant. When two individuals love one another, they rely upon each other. When you love God, you share in that mutual reliance. You seek evidence of God’s presence, but God seeks your presence in the world God has created.

Do you see the mutual relationship here? Those who live a godly life are dependent upon God to lead them on the proper path. Those who insist that self- knowledge is complete knowledge leave no room for the possibility of God in their life. Total self-reliance in the end is selfish. Think of individuals whom you have known who seem to be one hundred percent self-reliant. Do you find it difficult to be close to them? Of course. Think of others who are ready to admit they do not know all the answers, are not perfect, do not always see the proper path. Those are the vulnerable, those are the individuals most open to an exchange with other souls, and it is these people whose lives become spiritually enriched.

Life is for living, but life is for sharing, not dominating. Yes, power does corrupt, for in being corrupt one seeks more control. That control is necessary because of insufficient confidence, insufficient self-love. When one feels confident, one feels unthreatened. With no threat there is no need for dominance, for dominance arises out of fear—either the fear of destruction or the fear which is a part of jealousy, a fear of inadequacy. When one counters this fear with the confidence of being in the presence of one who knows, that fear becomes merely a mild concern but not a debilitating, controlling characteristic.

The circle that we spoke of last time is so important as a concept, for just as everyone is connected to everyone else in God’s light, everyone is dependent upon everyone else. The chain is as strong as its weakest link. The circle is as strong as its most self-sufficient link. None of you are asked to be victims, to be so meek that others easily take advantage of you. But each of you is in the end being asked to be free enough of your own sense of self-worth that you recognize the worth of others and then draw from their strength. Be willing to be inspired by another without the implied need of inspiring others.

The strength in the circle is not dependent upon the strength of the individual but the strength of the bonding, the connection that exists between you. The strongest connection is one of mutual respect. You must be willing to show that respect by honoring those qualities in others that you seek to obtain. You do not have to be like everyone else. You do not have to do everything that another does. But find in your circle, your community, your nation qualities in others that you emulate. Recognize those qualities, then seek ways of achieving them for yourselves. When you do, the quality of your lives will be strengthened, and your belief in God will be reinforced by your awareness of the god-like virtues found in others.

There is a balance here—a balance between a sense of confidence and the need for affirmation, for security, for answers to questions. The circle is unbroken when you are willing to reach out and be strengthened by another. The strength that you give others is the strength that others need, not the strength that you wish to give. Affirmations of value are provided to those who seek them. They are not merely provided by those who give them. Be willing to seek, be willing to look for, be willing to be open to God’s presence in the form of others. Just as you would not tell God what to do, you cannot tell another how to behave.

If you wish to know more about God, it is you who must become open to that knowledge. It is not God who imposes God’s presence upon you. A loving relationship is not imposed upon another. It is present, but it is drawn on by another willingly. When you allow yourselves to be quiet and reflective, you are drawing on God’s presence. God will not impose that presence upon you. God does not create crisis in order to prove to you that God is present, rather you become aware of God’s presence through your experiences of crises. You become aware of God’s presence because you are open to the need for that presence. You are vulnerable to that presence. You are receptive to that presence.

And so it is with your relationships with others. Be present and allow your presence to be sustaining to another, but do not go into others’ lives with the express purpose of sustaining them, for that is not a loving expression. It is a dominating one. If you wish to love, don’t dominate. If you wish to make a difference, be open. If you wish to help another, allow another to ask for that help and then be free to respond. Transition times are opportunities for you to be receptive, to be vulnerable to God. It is in that vulnerability that you will find God’s light most brilliantly.

You are blessed by God’s light because you seek it, not because it is thrown at you. You receive God’s blessings because you are open to them, not because you deserve them. Be sustained by those qualities in your lives that remind you of your inadequacies. Be strengthened by an understanding of your weaknesses. Be healed by your sense of pain. God’s love is yours. Be still, be open and be joyful.

Amen.