No judgment in relationships.
November 24, 2024
Judgment can be viewed in two specific perspectives. One is a value judgment; the other, an action judgment. There are no grounds for value judgments between people. There is, on the other hand, justification for action judgment. Judgment is perhaps not the best choice for a word recognizing disagreement among people.
In human relationships, there is no room for judgment at all. There is evaluation and opinion but no judgment, for judgment implies that there is someone worthy of being judge, of being the one responsible for determining right and wrong, and that is simply not possible. In a general sense, human beings are called upon to evaluate, evaluating their own actions, the actions of other individuals, nations, and philosophies. Critical evaluation which seeks an understanding has a place in life, but when the goal is not understanding but a definitive determination of worthy versus unworthy, absolute right versus absolute wrong, such activity is inappropriate yet common.
It is indeed true that one can support while disagreeing. Support does not imply full agreement, and that is okay. The difficulty for human beings is that too many connect support with the necessity for agreement. Either they agree and support, or they disagree and therefore do not support, or they interpret agreement as support, and they interpret disagreement as a lack of support. It is difficult to be criticized and yet feel supported. It is natural for all to interpret criticism as the withholding of support. What is important is to accept the place of disagreement in life while upholding the necessity and the essential relationship of support. It is a most difficult lesson that many are unsuccessful in fully achieving.